It’s hard out there for a heroine

Ah, debate…… how I DO enjoy it, but as a woman, I’m inclined to agree with the final statement at the end of this video, that women are afraid to talk. Often times I’ll wait to engage in debate on a topic until I feel I’m properly informed. Maybe it’s just in my personal nature to accept that I don’t know the ins and outs of every particular political situation, and so I default to “no comment”. Maybe it’s because the academic in me wants to wait until I’ve properly consulted source after source before I feel that I’m qualified to make an intelligent and informed opinion…

or maybe it’s something else….

I agree that men are more eager to offer their opinions on just about anything, even if they don’t know much about it, as evidenced by the puppy guy at the end of the video. Are women ignorant? or just afraid to talk? or hey, maybe we just don’t want to be labeled “stupid”.

I don’t feel that there is enough room for women to be “wrong”, or uninformed, and the media is very quick to make examples of stupid women. When women open our mouths to give an opinion we are battling against the opposite sex. Oh hell, I’m feeling feisty, let’s call it the patriarchy! We are already subjected to scrutiny because we are seen first as women, and then as individuals second. Personally, I feel a need to back up everything I say with data, or at least a hell of a lot of passion on the subject at hand, BEFORE I open my mouth. The truth is that often times I don’t feel comfortable opening my mouth without a battery of evidence behind me to support anything from my presidential candidate to how I like my burger.

I wanted to post on this yesterday, so I’m gonna try and tie it in here. McCain was quoted as calling his wife a cunt in front of 3 other individuals back in 1992. The story goes that she was playfully twirling his hair in her fingers and teased him by saying, “Looking a little thin up there, dear.” Now, this is a sensitive issue for a lot of men, but his reaction was not so tit for tat. McCain said “At least I don’t pile on the make-up like a trollop, you cunt.”

OK, maybe she pressed a button that was a bit too sensitive, but his retaliation was to cut where it’s deepest- her genitals, her sexuality. Not only did he reduce her entire essence and individuality to her sex, he also reinforced that he thought her sex was something that she should be ashamed of. Not cool. (Hi Matt! come out and play…..)This is why I and numerous other women AND men think Superbad SUPER-FUCKING-SUCKED for feminism.

It’s a hot button issue for me. Yes, it’s just a word, and I’m giving it power, and Lenny Bruce and bla bla bla, it’s just not being used appropriately. Your Firewire 410 isn’t being a little slut because it isn’t working properly, and your new MacBook Pro is overheating, it’s not being a bitch…these are two sayings I’ve overheard this week, and yeah, my ears perked up.

Wrapping it all up, you know, it’s kind of exhausting being a woman sometimes. Labeling yourself as a feminist means that there is this oppressive need to identify with a certain culture, to like what they like. I wonder to myself, am I betraying the sisterhood by wearing a miracle bra? Hell no, I just want my tits to look good in my new dress, but do I want my tits to look good for me, or for someone else? What would Gloria Steinem do?? The constant need to defend my shampoo, why I do/not shave my legs, to wear a bra, to not wear a bra, Hillary, books I’m reading, blogs I indulge in, anything pink, porn, my ice cream choice, my presidential candidate, reproductive rights, sexuality, kinkiness, and how that all relates to being a woman. It’s exhausting! I just want to like what Melly likes, because I like it, and not have it always need to reinforce the image of “woman” that others feel they need to have of me.

An honest question: if there was a woman who was willing to talk on that video, and she compared Bush to Sarah Jessica Parker forced to wear KEDS, “You know I don’t really like them, but….” would the words running through your head sound like ” wow, what a dumb bitch??” Did you have the same type of colorful words for the Darth Vader guy? Because when you look back at the footage, none of the men said anything profound, the women just did a craptastic job at making themselves look like vacuous arm candy. Grrrr.

via Mob Logic TV

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